Sarah - Week 23

As much as I was upset with myself last week, I still had a good weightloss so I don't think I really understood what I needed to do to change. This week, not so much. I stayed the same (thank god) keeping me at a total loss of a still respectable 56.2 pounds. Is it a great accomplishment? Absolutely. Could I have been to my goal basically by now if I hadn't gotten off track? Absofreakinglutely. This weekend at Penn State is going to be rough, but I'm staying extremely on track today and tomorrow to try to make up for it. Hopefully it'll be my last super wild and crazy weekend for a while.

I'm frustrated with myself for the lack of effort I've been putting into this diet in the past month. Before, when I could go to the gym every day, I could eat a lot more of what I wanted and not totally care about it. Now, I can only go to the gym a few select days per week and I need to reformat my plan of action. I know that once I have another great week, it'll be the motivation that I need to get me past this self-inflicted plateau and I'll be back on track.

It's funny because a few weeks ago, it seemed like I was so close to my 70 pound goal that 80 felt like nothing and now, it seems like 80 is miles and miles away. I know that I have to stay super extra motivated in the next coming weeks. A lot of what is holding me back is not being able to go to the gym, and a lot of why I can't go to the gym is Trader Joes.

I'm feeling totally overwhelmed with work right now - this long term job is nothing like what I have had before. At Kennedy, I was out of school by 230 every day with barely any lesson planning and not even a ton of grading. This is a full day's worth of planning (only to get worse in the coming weeks because I'm out of curriculum) where I don't get out until 330 at the absolute earliest and my pile of grades is a mile high.

Adding TJs on top of that is basically killing my gym time and my motivation. If I'm at TJs, I can't go to the gym unless I was miraculously scheduled for a 6-11 shift. If I'm not at TJs, I'm so exhausted that after the gym all I want to do is nap and lay around for the rest of the night and go to bed early and not get any of my grading done. I know that I have to do something about it, but I may just keep trucking through until I move to just Sundays in three weeks.

All in all, I'm frustrated, tired and need to get back on track. I've upped what I'm doing at the gym, giving me 100 extra calories burnt every time I go, but I also need to be wayyy more careful during the non-monday and tuesday days of the week and ESPECIALLY during the weekend. That's it for now, though I have a ton more to write about...maybe I'll do another update tomorrow.